advice column- jan 07
Dear dC,
Life has been tough on me lately. I lost my job in a BPO (a pretty tough place to lose a job), my girlfriend dumped me for a shorter, darker, uglier guy and my dad wants me to join him in the family business (which happens to be making the elastic bands that go into v-shaped underwear). I’m a bachelors In geography which isn’t the most sought after courses and lastly, I’m developing this weird infection in my …(edited and removed for the sake of my readers and their children).
Anyways, I’m looking for some music which will help me turn it all around. I’ve been listening to some Scorpions and BSB mixed up with a bit of early Abba but nothing seems to cheer me up…any advice ?
Much love
Harassed in Hyderabad.
Dear Harassed,
See, I read through the first bit and entered the zone known as perpexia (the land of the perplexed). It was only in that very last bit that a thunderous mass of white light shown through your terrible excuse for an advice seeking letter and it was clear.
BSB and early Abba? Scorpions?
Wrong wrong wrong. First thing you need to do is throw out your sacre bleu music collection and take first dibs at any ZZ Top album you can find (maybe you could start with Rio Grande Mud or Fandango). 3 men from Houston with huge beards and blues rock offerings should begin the humanizing process. The man-izing process will take more work though. I’m prescribing a week straight of nirvana’s Bleach, Nevermind and In Utero. Take a week off after that to let the dust settle in your newly rattled bones and switch to a healthy dose of any song/album you can find of Alice Cooper. Bryan Adams and Jon Bon Jovi are like cancer for you. Stay away as a fat person should stay away from cake. No matter how much you might like to believe it, singing ’18 till I die’ in the middle of a male dominated hyderabadi pub will not get you laid.
The music I have prescribed will expose you to more realistic sides of life such as apathy, incest, violence and despair. This will make your pathetic life seem awesome.
This in turn, is quite awesome.
May peace be with you.
And one last thing…grow a pair and quit whining.
-
dC
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more advice here
Life has been tough on me lately. I lost my job in a BPO (a pretty tough place to lose a job), my girlfriend dumped me for a shorter, darker, uglier guy and my dad wants me to join him in the family business (which happens to be making the elastic bands that go into v-shaped underwear). I’m a bachelors In geography which isn’t the most sought after courses and lastly, I’m developing this weird infection in my …(edited and removed for the sake of my readers and their children).
Anyways, I’m looking for some music which will help me turn it all around. I’ve been listening to some Scorpions and BSB mixed up with a bit of early Abba but nothing seems to cheer me up…any advice ?
Much love
Harassed in Hyderabad.
Dear Harassed,
See, I read through the first bit and entered the zone known as perpexia (the land of the perplexed). It was only in that very last bit that a thunderous mass of white light shown through your terrible excuse for an advice seeking letter and it was clear.
BSB and early Abba? Scorpions?
Wrong wrong wrong. First thing you need to do is throw out your sacre bleu music collection and take first dibs at any ZZ Top album you can find (maybe you could start with Rio Grande Mud or Fandango). 3 men from Houston with huge beards and blues rock offerings should begin the humanizing process. The man-izing process will take more work though. I’m prescribing a week straight of nirvana’s Bleach, Nevermind and In Utero. Take a week off after that to let the dust settle in your newly rattled bones and switch to a healthy dose of any song/album you can find of Alice Cooper. Bryan Adams and Jon Bon Jovi are like cancer for you. Stay away as a fat person should stay away from cake. No matter how much you might like to believe it, singing ’18 till I die’ in the middle of a male dominated hyderabadi pub will not get you laid.
The music I have prescribed will expose you to more realistic sides of life such as apathy, incest, violence and despair. This will make your pathetic life seem awesome.
This in turn, is quite awesome.
May peace be with you.
And one last thing…grow a pair and quit whining.
-
dC
---------------------------------
more advice here
Ha. Hahahaha. Oh God, more please.
Posted by
Anonymous |
11:49 AM, January 25, 2007
your wish is my command madame:)
Posted by
chitgo |
3:48 PM, January 25, 2007