hahaha
for all the godamn idiots in the world that send 'forwards'..this one's a classic..
> I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to
>send me
> > your stupid chain letters over the past years.
> >
> > Yes, thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of what's
>left of my
> > heart for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
> >
> > Because of your concern...I no longer can drink Coca Cola because
>it can
> > remove toilet stains.
> >
> > I no longer use Gladwrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
> >
> > I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be
>pricked
> > with a needle infected with AIDS
> >
> > I no longer use margarine because it's one molecule away from being
> > plastic.
> >
> > I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
> > perfume
> > sample and rob me.
> >
> > I no longer receive packages from Austpost or TNT Express since they
> > are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
> >
> > I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a
>stupid
> > number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls to
> > Jamaica,
> > Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
> >
> > Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I
> > forward
> > an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
>(man,
> > the BIBLE did not mention it works that way!)
> >
> > I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who
>is about
> > to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).
> >
> > I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I
>receive the
> > $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in
>their
> > special e-mail program.
> >
> > Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me!
> > I will now return the favor.
> >
> > If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60
> > seconds, a large bird with diarrhoea will mess on your head at 5:00 PM
> > this
> > afternoon and the fleas of a thousand camels
> > will infest your armpits. I know this will occur because it
> > actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of
> > a friend of a friend of a friend of my next door
> > neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's 8th husband's 2nd cousin's 3rd
> > husband's ex-wife's mother's beautician!
> I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to
>send me
> > your stupid chain letters over the past years.
> >
> > Yes, thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of what's
>left of my
> > heart for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
> >
> > Because of your concern...I no longer can drink Coca Cola because
>it can
> > remove toilet stains.
> >
> > I no longer use Gladwrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
> >
> > I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be
>pricked
> > with a needle infected with AIDS
> >
> > I no longer use margarine because it's one molecule away from being
> > plastic.
> >
> > I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
> > perfume
> > sample and rob me.
> >
> > I no longer receive packages from Austpost or TNT Express since they
> > are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
> >
> > I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a
>stupid
> > number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls to
> > Jamaica,
> > Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
> >
> > Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I
> > forward
> > an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
>(man,
> > the BIBLE did not mention it works that way!)
> >
> > I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who
>is about
> > to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).
> >
> > I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I
>receive the
> > $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in
>their
> > special e-mail program.
> >
> > Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me!
> > I will now return the favor.
> >
> > If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60
> > seconds, a large bird with diarrhoea will mess on your head at 5:00 PM
> > this
> > afternoon and the fleas of a thousand camels
> > will infest your armpits. I know this will occur because it
> > actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of
> > a friend of a friend of a friend of my next door
> > neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's 8th husband's 2nd cousin's 3rd
> > husband's ex-wife's mother's beautician!
